You know what really hurts ?

The feeling of not able to be yourself.
Every time I turned bad,
It made me so much of a guilt,
and I would end up crying, feeling the pain.
But it was how it suppose to be.
How everyone would be just in place.
Is just me, not being able to overcome the changes.
It's okay to be hated,
It's okay to be alone
and It's okay to be blamed.
Like a million times I tell it to myself,
which I don't seems to be okay yet.

Positive, positive !!
Being bad makes others feel good.
Being bad makes you stronger handling it.
If by being bad does make others together.
Like how wars sacrificed the weak ones to win the entire empire.
So,It's  really just okay.
As long you are truthful to yourself,
You need not be afraid of the truth being revealed.
The journey is long or maybe forever,
But it's really just okay.

I like my instagram.
I like my LINE or wechat walls,
that I could just post my blessed days.
But it should has never existed like how I would bid farewell to them all like now.
Looking into what's just on the pictures that appeared to be bless or so called the temporary joyful moments,
Is like how I always cheated myself that reality is still fine,
I hate histories...
History of being blessed or even once being loved or even being taken care of,
As it grew, as it all gradually disappear.
Is just so much of a pain.
I want live everyday liked how I suppose to be.
Nothing and just keep moving on.
Cause It will and definitely will be okay.